Saturday, May 27, 2017

As the Sarah Turns: And Poof!

ugh signs... talk is talk. When some talk has an obvious message and is questionable, the main thing is: it is talk that is coming in to more question. I talked to a "Ray Ray," last night, and there is honestly no real interest from me to the literal person. But, since some arbitrage gossip is still in question, I'll continue to run myself off of my next cliff. "Ray Ray" appeared to still have some interest in Stacy. While I do see Stacy as a continued inferior and with some serious immaturity, we are not high school "mean girls," we are "murder bitches," and it is kill or be killed for life. It is seriously not safe for any man to keep me provoked with Stacy. She is my stalker and harasser and will kill to get away with whatever tormenting gang rape she can get away with. I don't like some other questionable signs with Mike having some connection or shares with Jim either. I know Jim is a nigger. Jim, Justin, Stacy, Jon, Shawn, and John are all cut throat, stalking, harassing haters who should be treated as a gang rapist Muslim who believes in their sharia law and supremacy. They will always be the worst desperate slobs of judgement who will always want to desperately stay on top while they have the worst lies or most desperate damning truth where they want me to be damned to their sense of chauvinism and supremacy S-H-A-R-I-A C-O-N-V-E-R-T L-A-W. Those are a handful of people I would feel like I'm being ganged up on and murdered to death, but I could throw in a few other names...........Mike, I can't say I think you're a dumb man yet. This is one worst impression of an instance; but instances like this almost want to drive me insane. (Besides this is the fear that some other random vain men are still out there running around being pigs with credit like I cared or they seriously had my heart). I've been past the point of dry heaving in disgust, I can really only expect the worst, but I can't stop the fight against always expecting the worst. Although I'm getting older; I still hope for days that I can expect better. Anyway, because of the way some dominance and pidgeon-holing stays the same, I can only be a pidgeon-holed self admitted loyalist that does demand loyalty. I'd have thought more men would have had more common sense by now when it comes to me, but I'll have to lower my bar a little and say I can only expect loyalty. I know I've had higher labels where I understand what it means to have a smart sense of balanced maturity, and it isn't even that I feel I'm lowering myself when I know I continue to say "no," to the gang-raping rapacious behavior. And Mike, I can only give you some benefit of the doubt where I can't believe that you would seriously have as much of a sick motive as the others, but I wouldn't keep testing me like that if I were you. I used to idealize in having a man who had a more than decent level of emotional integrity, but when I feel I have gone too long with too few of men in understanding what it means to have any kind of emotional common sense? People just don't understand how heavy that is and the way I can get depressed. IT'S NOT THAT I'M ASKING TO BE LIED TO EITHER! I'm the most pidgeon-holed into having the most serious expectation of loyalty where it is mostly focused against my enemies, but it is also shut the f&*k up! with all the judgement and threats. Just shut the fuck up and act like you care for me and are on my side, and don't keep me so sickly underestimated either. Does every other man really want to hear a broken record of Tina Turner's "What's love got to do with it?" Why the hell were some men ever in my life? I'm in a little bit of a rage right now and I don't mean to look at every man in the room as my "sharia law jihadi," I was a little triggered to be set off...... and because that was all said I feel I can only disappear and be back to an even more "single" square one. Poof! I'm not with anyone.