Monday, December 28, 2015

Happy Birthday To Me

Technically it is tomorrow but my main celebration is today. I am saving the dessert for tomorrow because I don't want to have dessert two days in a row. I am trying to watch my girlish figure. But, I am looking forward to going to Starbucks or Barnes and Noble tomorrow for both a good latte and probably a piece of cake from the Cheesecake factory unless I change my mind on one of their cookies. Today the ginger apple cider beer will have to suffice. I am also doing another one of my work hauls tomorrow by doing both jobs, but I don't mind. Technicalities are technicalities. In stripper years, I will be 27. I worked on my birthday last year too. It was shitty. I have given myself more than enough satisfaction in keeping Jon shunned, so he won't be able to be as much of a ruin on my birthday this year as last year. While I think I have HAD purged out any more cries that I could cry, my hate isn't as entirely purged out of me. And, I am not hoping to be visited by any intentional oil rig workers wanting to get my oil. ~I came to party like the night will never end ~ lets party again ~lets party again... ~I'm a party girl ~ in a party world...~ titties real, it's fantastic~ (not seriously that it will never end. I like the way it can be cryptic) lol ahhahaah ha (not too serious about the crypticness either)... ..........I think my job is going well so far. I've gotten the hang of it and don't dread it too much. I don't dread being a stripper too much either. I'm not crazy about the toll it will take on my car but my car is already having a toll with the night job that I've had. I hope to be able to move soon. Right now, I am in a temporary period of being a severe broke and have to push myself for extra work time, but once I get my first paycheck and after the next few keep rolling, I will cut my hours more. I was hoping to only work 3 nights this week with stripping, but I will have to work 4. Unless I get extra extra lucky. Who knows, maybe I will make bank on New Years Eve but nothing is ever definitely predictable..... My child has been so onry today, but I've finally got her in the bath and the buzz of the beer is starting to kick in a little. She can be so manipulative and controlling when having to be the center of attention, but it feels good to know I'm demanded for and loved sometimes. Today wasn't the best time for her to be like that, but it isn't that her brattyness is a total upset... Until then, signing off.........

Thursday, December 10, 2015

Thoughts of the Day

Today is a very, very bad day. Although there are some good things, today has just been an awful day. I have so many things to stress over and thoughts of rage that I cannot discuss...... Anyway, what a busy and hectic month of December. Work has been in a little bit of a crisis lately because I have had to bounce around different clubs a little and just haven't been making the regular, average pay. I'm back at the original spot that I had started and the club has a different name. I have hopes that I will be making decent money again. Once I start my other job, I should have a better steady income and more time to spend with Mitzi. Like I said, I still plan on keeping my night job, but won't be working as much as I used to. One of my stressors is getting the specific gift that Mitzi wants. It is out of stock everywhere and I don't know when any of the stores will be getting more shipments of this toy. If I order it online whenever it is back in stock, I don't know if it will be in time for Christmas......... I had planned on going out of town this weekend to go stripping, but it probably isn't going to be until January until I will be able to make it to somewhere like Pittsburgh, Baltimore, or some other town to think of traveling to. Besides some of the more regional clubs, I hear about the ones in Texas often. Strip clubs in Texas is the one of the areas most talked about. I'd have to save for a trip like that, and hope it would payoff. It will probably be Pittsburgh I try sometime in January. I just have to make up my mind which club I'd try. Some are open til 2 and others are open all the way until 4. I don't know. December has too much stress, hustle, bustle, and too much to do. It would be better if I stayed in town this weekend. ...

Sunday, September 6, 2015


Still on my mind...... Not sure what to think or say of some of the signs I saw today..... ha ..... Should I really feel pressured into being persuaded you want to marry me? Should I let myself take it seriously and seriously give myself something to think about? I've seen signs before and the way people BS for whatever reason they BS but nothing has ever come about. Why people would ever continue to make up their own BS relationship stories or intentionally prank me in the media, I will never know....... Amongst so many reasons, Denny Williamson has been my most terrorizing embarrassment of a stalker. He gives himself any and all credit and thinks he has my submission. (pope example) I have already screamed in front of everyone how much of a psycho, stalker, and rapist I think he is. Knowing I have such strong negative emotions against him and his psychotically terrorizing barbarian, he INTENTIONALLY IGNORES ME THINKING IT IS HIS RIGHT TO STALK ME AND TRY TO CLIMB ON TOP OF ME. HE THINKS HE DESERVES TO TERRORIZE, THREATEN, AND HARASS ME WITH HIS RAPIST "DOMINANCE." He lies and like other vain psycho barbarians, he tries to put me in bondage to his self and what his rules are. He has vainly and sickly insinuated that I wanted him and wants to put HIS VAIN LIES ON ME THAT I AM THE ONE "WHO IS TOO VAIN." The sick psycho he is, is what he wants to lie and say of me. I have been so disgusted against him for the longest time. I HAVE AND WANT NOTHING TO DO WITH HIM. I hate that I have another reason to feel embarrassed in front of you with his sick vain self-entitled pig............... For right now, I really don't have much more to say. I wish I could say it is all short and sweet today, but it is short and screaming. I'm going to let myself have a good day anyway and hope u do the same.